It is difficult to pinpoint exactly what defines my
little sister. I look back at our relationship and
wonder what every brother that is 15 months older than
his sister does... Every moment I can remember was a
competition. We would push each other to the breaking
point, whether it was a matter of wits(I won those
believe it or not), a matter of drive (I lost
those...I know, its shocking), or a matter of
endurance ( again, I lost). My parents taught us how
to succeed, follow through, know the difference
between right and wrong, how to treat others, but most
importantly... how to make the most of our
opportunities and capitalize on our experiences. Our
true friends and relationships were and are built upon
this. Those closest to my sister and I know that we
value our time with those closest to us more than time
or money could put a value on. If we deem it
important, we would be there, without regard to how it
effects our lives going forward. We understand the
importance of the people in our lives, it DEFINES who
we are...it does not matter what we accomplish here,
how much money we make, or the possessions we have,
BUT how the people around us are touched by our being
together. Lindsey understood this better than most
and had IMPACT on every person she met. Her drive,
her resolve, and her desire to be the best in
everything she did left a mark on all of us.

It is so unfortunate that something like this occurs
and realigns what we feel is important. We must take
the time to understand that only one thing defines who
we are... the people that surround us and those that
nudged us in the right direction. Lindsey understood
and appreciated this. It is difficult to recognize
this lesson after she is gone. I spoke with many
people in the last couple weeks, but this has allowed
me to learn more about the importance of who we
surround ourselves with and defines that Lindsey was
much wiser than I ever gave her credit
for...(Remember, I am the big brother and supposed to
pick on her constantly!!!) First off, we were on the
same page with the friends and teammate
thing...fortunately, I get that. There are two pieces
to me that really shocked me over the last couple of
weeks that we should all take away. Lindsey really
appreciated others that guided her through high
school, college, and work life. While I can
understand this idea, I never appreciated the thought.
She showed this by following up with those that had
impact on her life and letting her know what she was
doing (this makes people feel great... if you don't
believe me, call a teacher, a coach, coworker, or boss
that showed you something that you use in your
life!!!!) This part I can understand, but most of us
just push forward and don't look back. The second
bit, I would have never done, until now.

Lindsey knew how to live in the moment. We all have
15 things going on in our lives. We move from one to
the other, never appreciating what is going on at that
point, but instead looking forward on the next item to
do. While most of us had 15 things to do, Lindsey had
30, but appreciated what was going on at that exact
moment and did not look forward to the next item on
the list, but listened, understood, and took action on
the item that was at hand. This is how she had impact
on ALL of us. We felt and knew that she cared and
that we were the most important thing in her life at
that moment. If we needed 15 minutes or 15 hours, she
was there for us. The rest would wait.

I miss my sister...I had so much to tell her... I
never got to tell her how proud I was of her... I
always figured that we would get to a point in our
lives where we would have the time to discuss how we
made each other become driven, never to fail, that no
one's expectations would ever exceed our own or each
others...we never wanted each other to have the upper
hand or feel they were out doing each other...We
learned from each other how to succeed beyond
everyone's expectation's...our friends, our parents,
our teachers...We wanted to make everyone that knew us
proud...It is so comforting knowing that Lindsey
succeeded in this...I am certain she failed at things,
but I know that her successes and lessons learned more
than outshined them...Lindsey has defined greatness,
achieved success, understood the importance of
relationships, and was a role model for those younger
and older that knew her. This is my biggest regret
and if you have the opportunity, let others know how
they impacted you and how your benefit of knowing them
made you better!.

Regret...For me, this is difficult. I wish I could
have said all of the things I thought, wished I had
done more, and spent more time with her. She knows
these things now. Lindsey knows we loved her, knows
how much she prodded us just to drive us to greatness,
and would be completely disappointed knowing that we
did not push on with our lives. She did not live with
regret, but learned from mistakes and things she did
not do. Lindsey never made the same mistake twice,
did not live with regret, and made the most of each
moment...we should be so lucky.

I am beyond asking the question why, there is no
answer ...I know that I will get this answer someday
and will be delighted. It is selfish for me to wish
she were here as Lindsey is in a far better place.
For some of us, this is a difficult concept! I am
certain my Grandpa's and Grandma are taking care of
her and showing her around. This is so comforting!

When I have a moment to come up for air and catch my
breath, I often think of my sister. I reflect on her
standards of excellence, her drive, her success, and
her ability to live in the moment. This makes me want
to be a better person. I cannot and will not ever
fail. I believed this before, but am always reminded.
I wish everyday for someone to tell me everyday what
I cannot do, to prove this fact.

Going forward, I will attempt to carry on my sisters
memory by living in the moment, continually
persevering when times are difficult, and remembering
those that allowed me to achieve success in my life.
This is my tribute to my sister's memory. God bless
all that knew her and act the way she did. We are so
fortunate for knowing her and the world will be a
better place acting as she did.

My last memory of my sister and I defines how our
relationship worked throughout our life...

We were both home for Christmas in Michigan...we both
put on goofy looking clothes so that we could go
outside in the snow. We went on top of a hill and
began making a snowball. As you can imagine, with two
of us working on it, we got the snowball to about 4
foot high...I suggested that we push it down the hill,
but Lindsey says " how about one more roll..." At this
point, I can't give in, so we both push really hard
and roll it over one more time. This took ALOT of
effort!!! At his point, Lindsey says, "Let's push it
down the hill..." I come back with..."Why can't we
get one more roll???" Not to be shown up, Lindsey
says, "Fine with me!" So we both really put our back
and legs into, but we can't quite get it over...she
looks at me with that little grin, and I smirk
back...Then I light the fire..."Put your ass into it,
and let's get this thing over..." The grin turned to
fire...I can honestly say, I may have pushed about 50%
of what I pushed the time before...I am certain you
know the result! Needless to say, the snow ball went
forward one more rotation and then we shoved it down
the hill. The snowball was taller than me and then we
had a snowball fight. We walked back to the house,
knowing that we accomplished something that met our
expectations. This was rare and we were proud of
ourselves... no one ever knew except our parents when
the snow melted and they looked out through the trees!
It is funny that at 26 and 27 we did something so
meaningless o the world, but so important to us. It
seems ironic that our parents were the first ones to
be proud of it...

When I went home after Lindsey passed, the snowball
remained at a height of 3 feet even though they had 50
degree weather and rain.

It will be impossible to forget Lindsey Ferris...her
drive, ambition, ability to live in the moment, THAT
laugh, and her tenacity to succeed. I will remember
my sister for the rest of my life through her actions,
but most of all her ability to live in the moment and
have impact on all those with which I have contact.
She understood how to be great and others to feel and
be important!

Thank you to all of you for your presence at the
memorial service, what a great tribute to Lindsey. We
all learned about her and the effect on others.

Thank you to all of you at the funeral, it was
unbelievable to see so many that knew and respected
her.

Thank you to all that carry on her memory, actions,
drive, and perseverance... Your ability to apply these
things show that Lindsey had a presence in your life.
My family and I were impressed by your presence, your
stories, and your tribute to my sister. The Air Force
took amazing steps to show their gratitude towards
soemone that defined greatness. They appreciated her
service and we should be very proud of the country we
live in. We are protected by the finest people that
voluntarily put their lives in dager to protect
everything we have. You have had an impact on our
lives and will not be forgotten. Thank you to all
that have known Lindsey...I am certain that you are
better for it!

Nick Ferris